Fuck You!

I see you driving 'round town
With the guy i love and i'm like,
Fuck you!
Ooo, ooo, ooo
I guess the change in my pocket
Wasn't enough i'm like,
Fuck you!
And fuck him too!
I said, if i was richer, I'd still be with ya
Ha, now ain't that some shit? (ain't that some shit?)
although there's pain in my chest
I still wish you the best with a
Fuck you!
Ooo, ooo, ooo

Yeah i'm sorry, i can't afford a ferrari,
But that don't mean i can't get you there.
I guess he's an xbox and i'm more atari,
But the way you play your game ain't fair.


I pity the fool that falls in love with you

Oooooo,
I've got some news for you
Yeah go run and tell your little boyfriend!

Things Are Short Lived...

I'm not ok. I don't feel good. Will didn't turn out like I wanted. It was going to be awesome... if only he hadn't just gotten out of a relationship with his ex-bf. Now he wants to date around... see what's out there. Which I get. But then he's telling me about the guy that he went on a date with. And he's telling me that he can confide in me because he feels comfortable with me. WTF does that mean? He doesn't feel he needs to be purely romantic, purely sexual, or purely friendly with me. His words. So I'm just the in-between guy. That makes me feel SOOO good.... :-/

He's not sure if I'm the right guy.. he wants to find out what's out there first before settling. So I MAY be the one, but he doesn't know. Whatever... I told him fine... that's all great.. but I'm not going to be waiting around forever for him to figure that out.

I'm so disheartened... heartbroken... frustrated...

So Freakin' Happy

So why am I so happy? Haha. Well... Seriously 2 days after I wrote the "Search for a BF" blog post, I randomly get a message on Facebook from someone I did not know. It said something like:
"hey there. You look real familiar. Do you go to CSUF (a nearby college)? Or have you been in my Starbucks? I work at the one next to Disneyland."

So I respond:
"no I don't go to CSUF and I don't think I go to tour Starbucks enough for you to recognize me. But you are friends with a few of my friends at Disney. No matter! It's nice to meet you. And you have a great smile, btw."

I had checked out his profile to make sure he liked boys first. :P and then from there we messaged each other a few times on Facebook and learned a little more about each other. He eventually gave me his number and said "we should hang out soon."

From there we kept texting each other. I still hadn't met him yet so I found out when he was working next and told him I'd visit and get a coffee. So I stopped by. He was so excited to see me. He gave me my drink for free. :) unfortunately there was a line so I didn't stay to talk. But it served its purpose. I just wanted to see what he looked like in person. So I said we should actually have lunch and get to know each other.

We went for sushi. He loves Asian food. In fact, he loves Asians. Haha. He actually learned Chinese and is a Buddhist. He knows more Chinese than I do! He's SUPER tall. He's 6'5". And he wears really cute glasses... Such a turn on! And he's just a really sweet guy. Oh and he's HOT. Like, one of the cutest, hottest guys that I know. He's also younger.. 21. So I'm 5 years older... But it doesn't seem to bother him. Oh, and his name is Will :)

And for our first meeting, I was actually really comfortable talking to him. It was really fun to just get to know him. And I was able to talk about myself without feeling like, "am i going to say the wrong thing?"

We both enjoyed each other's company and said we felt really comfy with each other. So I asked him again what we should be... Friends with Benefits or more? I then added that I would love it if we were more than just friends with benefits because I really liked him. He immediately agreed and said he wanted more as well. So I told him that we should just go on a couple more dates to get to know each other more and not put any pressure on each other by saying we're in a relationship with each other or anything like that yet. He liked the idea.

So we hung out again a few nights ago. He came over to watch Harry Potter and he brought over a pie and ice cream. :) we cuddled up on the couch and talked and watched the movie. Soooo awesome. We stopped the movie halfway and went into my room because we couldn't keep our hands off each other :P No details... but it was definitely a good time. After that and after watching the rest of the movie, it was late. So I invited him to stay the night. :) guess he planned on it because he had clothes in the car :P

We spent the rest of the night on my bed telling each other our life story. It was great to just lay there with him and talk. I've never done that with another boy. And he would randomly just grab my face and give me a peck. So damn cute!!

Tonight, we went on another date. I originally had invited my roommate to see the Beauty and Beast stage show. I had gotten a pair of free tickets through work. This morning, my roommate texts me and offers her tickets to Will. She said that she wanted us to have a fun night out together. She's being really supportive because she wants the best for me. And I told her this is one of the nicest things she's ever done for me. :) So I offered the tickets to him and he immediately jumped at the chance. We rode in the same car to the theater.. and as we walked up to the theater, he reached for and held my hand. So cute! And after that, when we were walking around, he put his arms around me. During the show, he reached for my hand and just kissed it. He just knows what to do to put a smile on my face. :)

The show was also Will's "debut" to my friends. Two of my friends were also at the show. So he was introduced to them. One of them already knew him because Will is that awesome Starbucks barista that remembers who you are and your drink of choice. ;) But yeah, I was excited to introduce him to my friends. Because he's WAY hot and yes, I wanted to show him off! :P

After the show, we were both hungry, so we drove through a fast food joint and brought it back to my house. We just sat in bed, watching TV, and eating fast food. He said it was refreshing to be with someone that enjoyed eating. :) I had to agree.

Tomorrow night, we're going out for dinner at a place called the Boiling Crab. I've only heard GREAT things about the place and I'm excited for him to introduce me to it. I'm just super excited about spending more time with him. I'm enjoying it and letting things just happen. I'm making sure not to put pressure on each other and I think that's what making being with him enjoyable. :) YAY! So happy!

(BTW! This was my 300th Post! YAY!)

Never Too Early

It's NEVER to early in my books for CHRISTMAS music! I love listening to Christmas music! It just makes me happy to listen to the songs that I grew up with and all the new songs that have been created in recent years. It just makes me think about being around friends and family... it always brings a smile to my face. :) I love this time of year --- and I won't let anyone tell me that it's too early!!

'Tis the Season everyone!!

The Search for a BF

More and more, I'm thinking about how nice it would be to have a relationship with a guy that I love and that loves me back for who I am. I hadn't really thought too much about having a boyfriend until recently. I mean, yes, I've wanted to meet guys and date. But I think I'm finally ready to have a relationship with a boy. I've become a LOT more comfortable with myself and how I live my life. It would just be great to have someone to have fun with, laugh with, talk to, etc.

The only problem is, I still haven't figured out how to find the guy of my dreams. I seem to be looking in all the wrong places. When will I finally find him? And how will it end up happening?

I'm Bored...

So my Halloween costume isn't as slutty as last year's Buzz Lightyear costume.. but I'm still going to be slightly sexy. I'm going to have a sleeveless shirt on so I'm going to need my arms to look good. So I was just working out my biceps right now...

And then I got bored so I opened Photo Booth and took a pic :P Enjoy.

26th Birthday

It was my 26th birthday this past Sunday! It was a REALLY long day.... Let's do a quick explanation of why it was one of the longest days I've had in a while:

• Saturday night, I was at Disneyland with family until 11pm
• And then I went home to study my lesson plans for a class I had to teach at work in the morning... a class that I didn't know I had to teach until a few days before
• Stayed up until 3:30am to get comfortable with the "script" of the class
• Woke up at 7:30am, on my birthday, to get ready and be at work at 9:00am
• Arrived at 9:00am to prep the classroom, class started at 10am
• 8 hour class... with an extra 45 minutes of wrap-up time for me. Didn't leave work 'til 7pm
• Went straight from work to a birthday dinner with my friends
• At the birthday dinner, one of my friends ask me, "What do you have to do tomorrow?" which means, "Do you want to go to Vegas?" -- they/we go to Vegas all the time
• After some convincing, I agree to go to Vegas for the night!
• We leave for Vegas at 11pm... arrive there at 2:30am.
• We immediately walk down the Strip and find drinks and get drunk
• We stay up until the sun comes up
• We go back to our cars to sleep/nap
• We wake up at 9:15am to satisfy my craving for a Vegas buffet
• We eat at the Mirage breakfast buffet... stay for the beginning of lunch and I eat my favorite buffet food: crag legs!!
• My friend drives us back home in a hurry, because I have to be at work for my show choir at 4:30pm
• I make it home at 3:45pm, rush in to get changed, and then rush out the door.
• I arrive at show choir just a few minutes late... have a 3 hour rehearsal with my students
• I rush out of rehearsal to go to Disney for work... rehearsals for the Christmas parade.
• Rehearsals at Disney last from 8-midnight.
• I arrive back home past midnight... which is now technically Tuesday morning.
• Instead of going straight to bed, I shower and watch two hours of TV
• And then I peacefully sleep in my bed until 1pm :)

Even though it was a very hectic, busy, and tiring few days, it was an awesome birthday spent with great friends. I really enjoyed myself and I wouldn't change it one bit. :D

Follow Me on Twitter!

If you don't follow me on Twitter, this is what you're missing out on:

This was taken for #showpantssaturday! ;)

Follow me @nytedragon!

My Internet Crush

Two months ago, I was on the internet dating hookup site that I always go on just checking out the guys on there when I get a message from a really cute guy. Hmm, why is this cute boy messaging me? When I looked at his pics, I thought to myself, "This is exactly the type of guy that I am attracted to!" So, I was excited to get a message from him and more interested to know why he would be interested in me. So I message him back and strike up a conversation.

His name is Garrett. He's white, a bit shorter than me, athletic build, swimmer, likes working out, WAY cute, funny, educated, motivated. Everything I want in a guy :P But after a few more messages, I notice that he's from Arizona.... 500 miles away :(

But that didn't stop me from messaging him and getting to know him better. He seemed to be interested in learning more about me as well. And since then, we've been talking every now and then. We've also swapped phone numbers so we text each other as well.

However, every time we chat now, it seems so superficial. It's always, "Hey, how's it going?" "What have you been up to lately?" "What'd you do today?"

I'm such a bad conversation starter. I'm even worse at keeping conversations going. So, everyone, please help me out! What do I talk about now? How do I keep our conversations interesting?

And I know you're asking, "Why are you so interested in keeping fresh with him? He lives far away..." Well, it turns out that he's getting a job offer out here in California in a month or two! He won't exactly be right next door, but he'll only be about 1.5 hours away. Way better than the 5-6 hours away that he is now. So we're most likely going to be meeting each other when he comes out here. I just want to keep him interested in me from now until then.

So how do I keep him interested? How do I make good conversation?...

I Broke The Rule...

I had a rule... never get mixed up with the drama at work. That means, don't date guys from work, don't hook up with guys from work. Nothing good ever comes from it. Relationships are bound to end and people get nasty. It has happened time and time again and I just see it destroying friendships. Not just the two people who are involved.. but all the people around them because then we have to choose sides... Just bad all around. So that was my rule... Don't Date/Hookup From Work!

Well... it happened. I broke the rule. A few weeks ago, one of the boys from work, Jonah, came up to me to just chat. He's a definite cutie. He's younger, by 3 or 4 years. He has such a great personality.. very fun loving and kind. He just has the cutest face and a really toned body. He once told me that he never works out.... damn him and his awesome genes. I guess I've always had a little bit of a crush on him.

Back to what was going on... he came up to me to chat. Then he proceeded to tell me that he has a mini-crush on me. I was taken aback. I was surprised and flattered and a bit excited all at the same time. He just thinks that I'm cute, I guess. So I then also told him that I've had a mini-crush on him for a while now too. :P He seemed to be happy to hear that.

Ever since that chat, we've been a bit more touchy with each other. We'll give each other hugs more often and just kind of hold each other or sit close to each other. A very innocent thing, but totally cute and totally comfortable. And then one day, he taught me a few phrases in Korean (he's learning Korean.. he loves Koreans). He taught me the basics: "Hello" and "How are you?" And then also, "You have a cute butt" and "I want to do it with you." LOL. Well, if that isn't telling me something, then I don't know what is!

Keeping my rule in mind, I kind of played it off and just laughed. And then we left work. But I was definitely thinking about it that whole night. Well... a few hours later, at home, I was bored and a bit horny (when am I not?). So I decided to get on Jonah's facebook and write on his wall: "So can you teach me how to say those Korean phrases again? :P"

A few minutes later, he messaged me on iChat. Actually, he attempted to video chat me so that he could teach me how to say it. Well, for whatever reason, the video chat wasn't working. It just wouldn't start up. Being playful, I say, "Well, you just have to come over and teach me in person." I forget what was said next, but to summarize, he said not to tempt him because he was pretty horny. Well, I definitely didn't stop it... OK, I actually encouraged him to come over. But really... I didn't think he was actually going to do it!

But the next thing he said was that he was going to hop in the shower and then head over. Whoa! It was really going to happen! Not sure what exactly was going to happen when he got here, but I was starting to get nervous! What am I wearing? What do I look like? What are we going to do when he gets here? Do I need a shower too? Seriously 10 million things going on in my mind.

Well, I ended up taking that shower. He got here about 15 minutes later. (oh did I mention that by this time, it was 4am?) I showed him to my room and we laid down on the bed together. I turned on the TV and we just kind of cuddled for a bit. It was really cute. We were spooning. And I hadn't had someone to do that with in a REALLY long time. And after a few minutes of that, he turned towards me and gave me a peck. And that little peck led to a pretty hot makeout session. And the makeout session led to clothes coming off. And well... you get the picture.

Ok... so he really likes rimming. He's a big fan of ass. And I guess he was a big fan of mine. and I wasn't complaining! He did that for a REALLY long time. It was awesome. And then there was some humping going on... which is the international signal for "I want to stick it in." Well, I really wasn't anticipating it getting this far... so I was a little hesitant at first. But... he made me extremely horny and I just couldn't say no. So I went and grabbed the condoms and lube and told him to let me have it.

Wow it was awesome. He had a nice cock. It was a nice size... not too big or small. Just perfect. And it definitely hit the spot! After pounding me from behind, he had me sit on it. And THAT really hit the spot. After a while of that, I couldn't hold it anymore and I came all over his chest. He jerked off for a bit, had me moan in his ear, and he came too. Both of our juices all over him. And by this time... it was 5:30am.

He took a shower and then got dressed. I walked him back out to his car. We gave each other a kiss goodnight and then he drove off. I broke the rule. And climbing into bed after that, I was nervous... what if our friendship changes because of this hookup? Is it going to be awkward when we see each other at work? I just don't know how that works... hooking up with someone that I have to see everyday at work...

Well, the next day came... and we were both at work. We see each other and we say hi. I was a bit cautious when saying hi, but he was his normal self. He came over and gave me a hug and just kinda held me by my waist as we talked for a bit. WHEW. Things are normal. And the only one being awkward was me. So I quickly relaxed and just let things be normal.

And since then, it's been normal... well we may be a bit more touchy than before. But I don't mind that. He still calls me his mini-crush. That's how we greet each other now. And so things are good. I'm just glad that breaking the rule didn't ruin everything. I'm not going to say that I'm going to just ignore that rule now... it's still in effect. Guess I just made that exception with Jonah. And I wouldn't mind breaking the rule with him again sometime in the near future ;)

A New (Slutty) Experience

So I have had so much going on in my life... And I'm a little bit frustrated that I haven't kept up with blogging because I'm about to write about something that happened with weekend, but there a few things that led up to it that I could've written about (and may still write about). But now if I do write about the backstory, it'll be out of order... but oh well. Anyway -- enough blabbering.. let's get to how much of a slut I am.

This weekend, I was in Las Vegas for my figure skating competition (which I will talk about in another blog post). Sunday morning, my friends who I was there with left because they had to be back at home for work. I, however, had no other obligations for the rest of the day, so I decided to sleep in and wait until the last possible minute to check out of the hotel. But what to do the rest of the day? I was in Sin City, by myself... I had to take advantage of this situation! So, I had been on Grindr the night before to check out the guys in the area. But, I didn't find anyone to my liking and noone had hit me up either. Well, how else can I find guys to just have some fun with??

Well... that's when I looked into going to a bathhouse - a place where gay guys go to basically have sex. I did some research on the place and it seemed that it was a clean one with a nice staff and above average reviews. So I decided to just go for it. I've thought about going to a bathhouse here in Los Angeles before... but I just never got the courage to do so. But this is the perfect circumstance now.. I'm alone in a place far away from home with lots of time to spare. So I just did it.

I drove up to the place, parked my car, got out, and stepped into Hawk's Gym. I walked into a tiny little lobby, and was met with a pretty cute latino guy at the window. I gave him my money and got my "daily membership" and he let me in.

The place was dimly lit and definitely clean. So that's good. The guy gave me a towel and a lock to use for the locker. So I walked over to the lockers and got undressed and placed the towel around my waste and locked up my stuff. I then started to walk around and just familiarize myself with the layout of the whole place. In the front, there was gym equipment which noone actually used. lol. Then there was a lounge with a big screen tv and then a pool table off to the side. Down the hall, there were a bunch of doors that led to private rooms. And then there was a steam room, a sauna, and a community shower. Other rooms included the small dark room, a porn room, a glory hole type room, and a large dark sex room equipped with sex swings and slings and other sexy things. :P

As I was walking around, I was getting looked at by the guys that were already there. Not too many guys.. and noone that really caught my eye, unfortunately. So I decided to stop in the steam room first. Walked in and saw that two other guys in there already. I sat down and started to just play with myself. One guy decided to leave, but the other guy stayed. He then struck up a conversation with me and asked if he could sit next to me. And then he motioned towards my dick and asked "do you mind?" I assumed he was asking if he could see it/touch it. Little did I know, he meant if he minded if he sucked it! So he went right for it and I wasn't about to stop him! Felt pretty good... but then it got way too hot in the steam room and I just had to get out of there.

I walked around a LOT with no destination.. hoping that a hot guy will randomly come in. I stopped in the porn room to just sit and jack off a few times. Some other guys came in to watch. One creepy old man asked if I wanted to join him in his room... I declined.

And then I was walking around and a younger, black guy came in. He noticed me and probably thought, "hey, another young guy," and just kinda followed me around. Obviously, he was interested. We walked into the shower together and took a quick shower side by side. We just talked for a bit while washing up. Then we walked into the big dark sex room and walked into the corner. There, we jacked each other off. And then we went down on each other. He seemed to like my blowjob, but I wasn't too impressed with his skills...

And THEN, he had me sit back onto this weird contraption on the ground, my feet in the air. I told him I wasn't going to be bottoming for anyone... but for some reason he just wanted to hump me. I'm not sure why that would feel good or be stimulating. But he did it. And I was just kinda lying there... totally uninterested and NOT turned on at all. A few people walked by to check out our action because they probably thought that we really were fucking. But NOPE... it was stupid. I finally just told him to stop and got up and got out. WAY stupid.

There wasn't much else that happened... There just wasn't anyone there that I was really interested in. Bummer. I guess I just wasn't lucky enough to have someone attractive be there the same time I was. But it was still a successful experience.. I finally got up the courage to do something crazy like this. And it wasn't like it was horrible. So I'm glad I did it.

PLUS, now that I've done it, I won't be nervous about going to one here in Los Angeles. I've already enlisted the help of Jason - and we're going to be going to one THIS Saturday together. :P It's going to be my birthday present to myself. LOL. If there aren't any hot guys to play with there, we'll just play with each other. ;)

Street Fair, Hookahs, and Kisses

Every year, the city of Orange, CA has their International Street Fair. They close off a stretch of road and set up booths and stages. They serve alcohol and food from different places around the world. They have "Italian Street," "Denmark Street," "Greek Street," "Irish Street," "Mexican Street," "Polynesian Street," and so many more. Tonight was my first night going to the street fair. Man, it was packed! So many drunk people just stumbling around. Within the first 5 minutes of arriving, I was shoved and had beer spilled all over my arm. Lovely.

I finally found my friends after about 15 minutes of searching. But when I got there it was already past 9pm and the whole place stops serving food and beverages at 10pm. So one of my friends and I hurriedly ran around trying to find food that sounded good, since we were hungry. We found Fish and Chips on "England Street" and that was amazing. Then we tried the "Dutch Fritter" and that wasn't so good. Then we went in search of Abelskivers from Denmark, but by the time we go there, it was already 10pm. So we never got to try them. :(

After the disappointment, we walked back to our friend Kelsie's place. All our drunk friends who had been at the fair since 6pm were all there already. They all sat out in the patio and were smoking some hookah. I had never smoked hookah before... I just don't like smoking... so I never found hookahs exciting or interesting. But since all my friends were doing it tonight, I was a little more than curious.

And what made me more curious was that my drunk friends were all passing their hookah smoke. Meaning, someone would smoke the hookah from the pipe, then hold the smoke in their mouth, and then pass the smoke off to another person. At first, it was a guy passing to a girl and a girl passing to a guy. But then it just got crazy and everyone was passing to each other. My gay friends were passing to other gay friends. Gay friends passing to my straight girl friends. Then gay friends started passing to my straight guy friends! AND THEN my straight guy friends started passing to other guys! LOL. It was just ridiculous!

So I knew I had to get in on it! PLUS, all my friends are super attractive. And though I never really had dirty thoughts about my friends (for the most part... :P), I wasn't going to pass up the chance at kissing them! ;) Especially, Matt, who is BY FAR the most attractive friend that I have. Yummy. He's such a cutie-pie. He's gay and has a boyfriend, but some harmless hookah passing wasn't going to be anything bad. Especially if everyone was just doing it. Oh and then there's also Dicky. He's super hot too.

So, long story short, I got up the courage and passed some hookah to them. And they passed some back to me. Best thing is... they were drunk, but I was completely sober. HAHA. So I'm definitely going to remember this. And one of my "straight" friends, Curtis (and notice that "straight" is in parentheses) kept taking a hit and then passing it to me. I mean, he did that with every boy in the beginning, but towards the end of the night, he passed it to me quite a few times. It was fun giving him a kiss :P

I know nothing will come from any of this.. and obviously I don't want it to. But I just love how all my friends are so crazy and ridiculous. And then a bunch of my friends are going to Vegas this weekend. I was supposed to go with them.. I actually got the days off already, but I didn't want to be there while everyone was REALLY drunk, while I just sat off to the side being sober (since I don't drink). Plus it was going to cost me some money, which I don't have right now. So I opted to stay home this weekend. Hope I don't end up regretting it.

Well, all in all, a FUN night with my friends. But then again, I always have the time of my life with my friends. Looking forward to this week since I have a couple of parties and celebrations to attend. Maybe there'll be more kissing to report!! ;)

World Cup

I grew up watching soccer/football. (Sorry... have to address this... I'd rather call the sport football, as that's the term that I learned when I was a wee kid growing up in Hong Kong. Then I started playing soccer when I was middle school. And since I do live in the US, I guess I'll call it soccer in this blog.. but know that I'd rather use "football" since I absolutely despise American football.. ANYWAY...) I get really excited when the World Cup rolls around. There's just not enough soccer coverage on American TV unless it's World Cup coverage. So having a month of awesome soccer to watch is just amazing to me. :)

Some may think that soccer is boring.. that nothing happens.. and usually only 1 or 2 goals in the entire game. Well, I appreciate the entire game. All the gameplay in the middle, the challenges, the attempted shots, it's just all exciting for me! I'd most certainly watch 90 minutes of soccer than 90 minutes of ... ugh.. baseball.

But aside from the exciting gameplay, I'm also finding that I'm in love with many of the players. LOL. Perfect example would be Portgual's Cristiano Ronaldo. I mean, who isn't in love with him? How can you not be?! And Spain's Fernando Torres is mighty hot! There are quite a few hotties from Germany, Australia, Netherlands. And soccer players just have awesome bodies. They're lean, yet not skinny. Just my type. :P

Well, here's the two of my favs. They're so hot!!

Cristiano Ronaldo:

Fernando Torres:

Tanning

Just some tanning out in the backyard to prepare for my upcoming Florida trip. Can't look too white!!

Saying Hi

It's really a shame that I don't post as often as I used to. I used to do it so often.. writing about the most mundane things. But I've come to realize that noone really wants to read about my boring life. But you know what? At least that means there's no drama. So I guess in that sense, it's a good thing. However, I do have two things to write about right now. Chris and Disney World.

Let's start with Chris. He's a new guy that I had met on Grindr. We kind of hit it off because we both were not looking for hookups (like so many people are on Grindr). We got to talking cuz we thought each other cute, and we eventually decided on a day and place to have lunch together. We went to California Pizza Kitchen and spent almost 2 hours just chatting. We learned about each other and it was good times. I always like a guy that's a talker, cuz that means I don't have to do too much of the talking. I mean, I did my fair share of talking. I wasn't just quiet and sitting there. But he did chat a lot and shared a lot about his life, which I like.

We continued to text each other after the lunch and decided on getting lunch again because we had talked about getting Thai for together. So he suggested that I order Thai food and have it delivered to my place so we can just hang out. I was a little hesitant to have him over at my apartment so soon, but I just felt comfortable with him. So I agreed to it. We sat in my living room, enjoying lunch, and just watching random TV. Eventually he got comfortable on the couch and we were a bit more touchy. He offered to give me a massage and I said yes. I never turn down a massage! After he was done, I returned the favor. And when I was done, I put my arm around his neck and we were just in each others arms watching TV. We gently caressed each other while we watched TV. It wasn't anything too sexual.. just sort of... nice. :) After a bit of time, it was time for him to go back to work and for me to get going since I had made plans with my friends. That night, he was on a plane to South Florida for a vacation with his mom. He's gonna be gone until June 7th. But we said we'll definitely do it again when he gets back.

The other thing is... I'm going on vacation too!! And it's also in Florida. Central Florida. Going to Disney World again!! I make a trip every year. This time, it's NOT alone! My best friend Jon is coming along. He's bringing his new boyfriend with him though.... Never met the boyfriend before.. so hope it won't be awkward hanging around them. I'm just gonna be the third wheel... great. At least they're staying in their own hotel room while he's there. And then when the boyfriend leaves, Jon will stay with me. Guess I'll just have to have a boy of my own to hang out with ... and I plan to. Jamie (yes, that Jamie..) should be spending some time with me.

I'm way excited! I always am when I'm going to Disney World. I leave June 2nd and come back June 9th. So it's only a few days away and I just can't wait!! I hope I find the time to write a report once I get back. :) And maybe there'll be more to report on Chris as well. ;)

Disney's World of Color

Can't freakin' wait!!

Exercising

I really need to get back into an exercise routine. I'm getting really disappointed (and almost disgusted) at the way I look right now. I keep thinking to last summer when I had such a nice body. And even then, I felt like I could improve tons. But now... it's just gotten out of hand. And so I really need to find a good workout program that I will enjoy doing and that will work. Last summer, I had P90X. And that was AWESOME. It really works. But no matter how hard I try to start that again (and I've tried multiple times now), I just can't. It's OLD to me. Same thing over and over. I just can't seem to stick with it like I did when I first went on it.

Well, I found this program called the "T-Shirt Body Program" in Muscle & Fitness magazine. They're workout exercises designed to make your body look good in a normal, everyday t-shirt. Sounds pretty cool, right? I mean, I'm not going to be walking around shirtless all the time... so looking good while in a t-shirt would be ideal. It's a pretty intense workout though. Lots of barbell and dumbbell work. I've actually never worked out with a barbell before so it was a new experience for me. Chest Presses are a LOT harder than I thought they would be. lol.

I hope to at least stick with this for a month. And I need to really think about increasing my cardio workouts. I stay active through my job... but after a year of doing the same thing, I'm afraid my body has adapted to it and I'm not burning as many calories as I should be. And all the excess fat is showing up as a spare tire around my stomach. :( I need to get rid of that ASAP. I'm going on vacation in the first week of June and I need to look GOOD. (I'll blog more about that real soon)

So wish me luck on my new workout endeavors. And I hope this finds everyone well. BTW, to all of you who may still read my little blog... write me a comment and say HI. Would love to hear from all of you :)

Complicated Relationship, Part II

I've had a few extra days to think about this. And reading the comments from Part I has awakened me a bit. And I've realized that getting in between two people is just about the worst possible thing anyone can do. No matter how tempted I am by one of those people, I shouldn't be doing anything to further that. If he wants to ruin his own relationship, then so be it. But I cannot/should not/will not help him with that.

Last night, he kept slipping in that I was cute. Here's the conversation after that...

Doug: "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were flirting."
Kyle:  "Well I'd say you were right. I think I am. I'm sorry... :P"
Doug: "Well, it's ok.. I guess. But you have a boyfriend..."
Kyle: "I know.. and you don't like me like that. But it's so easy to fall for you. I'm really sorry."
Doug: "Oh Kyle, don't be sorry. I just wasn't ready for a relationship when you asked for one."
Kyle:  "I understand. I know I have a bf and I don't want to ruin that, but I can't help but have feelings for you."

Sigh... told you it was complicated. I just have to be careful with how I talk to him now. Not going to egg him on. I won't just stop talking to him.. but if it starts to head in a dangerous direction, I'll put a stop to it. I am NOT going to that guy that breaks people up.

Complicated Relationship

You may want to read about Kyle/Cute Boy before you continue reading. (Kyle and Cute Boy is the same person, but I gave him a name after a few posts. So you may need to click on both links to get his full story)

So Kyle messaged me on Facebook tonight. We haven't chat like we used to in a while. And we used to chat almost every night on Facebook or via texts. And they were just fun little conversations that led to nowhere. Just to catch up.. see how each other were doing. We managed to stay friends after that one night together.

Well, a few weeks ago, he tells me that he's in a relationship now. I was happy for him, I really was. Because I know that's what he was seeking with me. And when he asked for it with me, I really couldn't say yes. I don't know why it was.. and I still don't. But I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Maybe I'm just scared of being in a real relationship with a guy? I've been out of the closet with my friends for almost 2 years now but I still haven't had a real boyfriend... but that's gonna have to be a different blog post.

Anyway... upon hearing his new relationship, I was happy, but I also couldn't help but be jealous. This boy, who has been pursuing me, now has found someone else. And now, all of a sudden, he's starting to spark my interest again. Why have I fallen into the "typical guy" category?? You always hear stories of guys who don't want to enter into a relationship (whether straight or gay) but once the other person is no longer available and no longer pursuing them, they're interested again. Is this what they call "the thrill of the chase?" When they're not available, they seem more exciting and more "attractive" in a way?

I know very well that Kyle still has feelings for me. He actually admitted to it tonight. I said something funny and witty and he just said, "you're really frustrating. You keep reminding me why I like you so much." And what do I do? I egg him on... trying to see what else he'd say. And in the back of my mind, I'm thinking about what it'd be like if he were to dump his boyfriend and get with me. How wrong is that??

I don't know what to do. Are my fears about the "thrill of the chase" accurate? Am I really trying to have a relationship with him? If he really were to leave his boyfriend to pursue me again, will I push him away again? And lastly, would I want to risk our friendship and try becoming more than just friends? Too many questions... sigh.

Getting Down and Dirty

I had the most fun I've had in a long while. I participated in the Irvine Lake Mud Run this Saturday. It's a 5K run with several obstacles, most of them involving mud. I found out about this charity event about 2-3 months ago and a bunch of my friends were signing up, so I decided that I would too. And up to about a week ago, I was pretty excited about it. Then as it came closer and closer, I started to think, "Why they heck did I sign up for this?" I don't particularly like running... I hadn't really run in a LONG time.. not even on a treadmill. I don't like getting dirty, and a mud run is the epitome of dirty. And I hadn't heard about details for the event at all. Our team captain was very unorganized and basically should NEVER be in charge of anything ever in his life. Good kid, but very irresponsible. So the combination of these things kinda turned me off to it all.

But I stuck to it and and decided to do it. After all, I already paid for it. I wasn't going to just waste my money. So on Saturday, I got there at 8am, ready to do some running. Being around the 4000+ runners got me in the spirit. So they counted us down and we started the race. Ran at a good pace... and then we got to the first mud pit. I took my first step, thinking that maybe if I tread lightly, I won't get too much mud on me. WRONG. I stepped and the mud pit was deeper and softer than I thought it would be! My leg went right into the pit. Second step was the same thing. I ran out of the pit, dodging all my friends who were playing around in the mud, getting each other dirty. I made it through the first pit with only my legs covered in mud. My white t-shirt was still pretty white. WHEW! But, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

Second mud pit was bigger. Again, deep and dirty. Tried to get away unscathed... but no luck this time. My friends saw that my shirt was still white and attacked me. I got tackled into the mud. BAM, my whole body was covered with mud. HAHA. And to my surprise, I actually enjoyed my time in it. The rest of the way, I ran with super muddy shoes and heavy, muddy clothes. I actually made it through the 5K without dying. No training! I was pretty surprised at how easy it was for me. We did play around in the mud obstacles, but the rest of the way, we kept a pretty good pace.

The last obstacle was a GIANT mud pit where we had to crawl in the mud. Of course, we took this opportunity to get as dirty as possible. Basically SWAM in the mud. And after crossing the finish line, there was a mud pit play area, where we proceeded to do some more mud playing.

All in all, it was an AMAZING experience. I ended up being very happy for doing it. I am way proud of myself for completing a 5K. Maybe with a little bit of training, I could even do a half-marathon! We'll see... hehe. :) Enjoy the pic!

In Memory of Razz

This post is in memory of Razz, who died a year ago yesterday. He was an awesome guy and he portrayed his energetic and fun-loving nature through his blog. I miss him terribly. Here is my favorite post from his blog:

My Life Has Been Perfect

:'(

Applying for Random Jobs

In the last week, I've inquired about and sent out resumes to so many different companies for so many different job openings. I really think it's time for me to move on from my current job or at least get an additional job because I need the money.

But I did want to share with everyone some of the jobs that I have applied for. Some are pretty normal and would be awesome to get because of the money or because it's what I want to do. And then some are just kinda funny and I think is just nice to think about.

1. Apple Store - I've wanted to work for Apple for so long. It's not secret that I'm an Apple Fanboy. And this week, one of my friends who already works at Apple referred me and sent in my resume to the managers. So hopefully something comes of it.

2. High School Summer School Math Teacher - I stumbled upon this opening the other night. The education budget in California is in such bad place so I think a lot of people will be jumping on this opportunity. But hopefully they'll at least consider me. This would be a perfect way for me to see if I REALLY like teaching because it'll only be for the summer. And the pay is pretty good.

3. Various Disney Openings - As a Disney employee, I have access to all the job openings within the larger Disney company. And there are TONS of openings... most of which I'm not exactly qualified for, but I still applied to them. Some are management positions. Some are actually related to education. We'll see if I even get a reply from any of those.

4. Ice Rink - I talked about my interest in figure skating and how I'm going to be training. I'm going to be writing a more in depth post about that soon. But my new interest in skating doesn't come cheap. Each time I go and practice on the ice is $8. I'm taking some classes that allow me some free sessions, but it's really not enough if I want to get really good at it. So I decided to apply to be a Skate Guard (like a lifeguard, but on the ice rink) and Box Office Cashier at two skating rinks nearby. I'm hoping that either of those jobs would allow me free time on the ice. I actually really hope I get this!

Now here comes the fun ones...


5. Go Go Dancer - I randomly was thinking about how I need more money and what are the best ways to get the money quickly and easily. Well, all of a sudden, being a go go dancer popped into my head. I've never really thought about doing this... most likely because I think it'd be totally awkward and I know people would be judging me. BUT, I thought about how much tips go go dancers must get every night! Now, I don't even know if I have a chance.. but I inquired about upcoming go go dancer auditions for Gameboi at Rage, a club in West Hollywood where on Friday nights it's Asian night. I went to the website and those go go dancers are RIPPED. I'm nowhere CLOSE to what they look like.. but if I can find out when auditions are, maybe I can workout more often. I will have an actual goal, which may help motivate me more. But I'm definitely keeping this as a possibility.

6. Cameraman/Prod Assistant for Randy Blue! - OK this one is the best! HAHA. I follow Randy Blue on Twitter and one day, they tweeted that they needed a part time cameraman/production assistant and to email them if interested. Well, I jumped at the chance. Why not, right?! Filming hot guys have sex?? C'mon! Best job ever! I emailed them asking for more information and they replied. Pay is decent and the hours would be pretty nice. I'd still be able to keep my regular job too. So I emailed them my resume (not that it would help because I don't think a Masters in Teaching would help me be a porn site production assistant). So I'm not really holding my breath for this one, but I just think it's totally funny and awesome that I jumped at the opportunity.

So there you have it... the various jobs that I applied for this past week. That's a lot, huh? I guess we'll see if anything comes of this. I really hope I get a reply or two. Like I said, the ice rink one, I really want to get. It'd be in addition to my normal job, and it'll help me get more skating in. So it's really the biggest win-win for me at this point. Please keep your fingers crossed for me and send your positive thoughts this way. Thanks guys. :)

The Winter Olympics End

I absolutely love the Olympics. They are my favorite TV program to watch. I'm going to have to say that I like the Summer Olympics better, but the Winter Olympics can be just as exciting! I'm not a big sports fan.. I don't usually seek out sports to watch on TV. I enjoy the occasional basketball game on TV, but I don't really watch many others. However, the Olympics are just different for me. Maybe it's because I get to watch so many different sports.. sports that aren't normally televised. For the Winter Olympics, I'm talking about all the downhill skiing, snowboarding, speed skating, figure skating, and bobsledding. I found myself watching them EVERY single night for these 2010 Vancouver Olympics. But I also think it's because I'm watching these athletes with so much passion and drive. These people trained ALL their lives to become the best at what they do. And then they're all gathered together, peacefully, at these Olympics games to compete against each other. How incredibly cool is that??

And like I said before, these Olympic games has reminded me of my interest in figure skating. Why had I not thought about skating before the Olympics? Well, I was thinking about this the other night, and it's because I think figure skating is a pretty... feminine sport. HA. And in 2006, when watching the Torino Olympics and the figure skating, I also thought about taking up figure skating as a hobby. But I think, either consciously or subconsciously, I didn't want people to think I was gay by going figure skating. Remember, I wasn't out back then... So I was careful with a lot of things that I did. But now, I've been out for almost 2 years (to my friends) and I obviously don't care if they think I'm gay for skating... cuz I AM gay! :P So I'm really serious and I'm taking the classes and working hard to become a great figure skater. My goal is to actually compete in Adult Figure Skating Competitions! It would be SOOO cool! Can't wait to keep everyone updated on this new development!

And now to conclude the 2010 Winter Olympics blog posts, I will post several pictures of Olympics hotties! ENJOY!

Aksel Lund Svindal

Evan Lysacek

Bode Miller

Scott Moir & Tessa Virtue (um.. how cute are these pics?!)

Ted Ligety

Sven Kramer

Dale Begg-Smith

US Bobsled Team!

Guys With iPhones (Part 4)

Another submission, brought on by torchyboy's suggestion for taking a picture for "Show Pants Saturdays" on Twitter. And then he suggested that I put it on Guys With iPhones. And it didn't take them but half a day to post it on the site. I seriously love the site. It's just awesome. So many hot guys to look at! But anyway, here's my ugly photo:

I Love EXPRESS

So I love the clothes from Express. They're nice. They make me look nice. They're slightly expensive, but it's not like I shop there all the time, so I don't feel too bad when I do go shop there. Most of my dress shirts are from there, and I have a few sweaters and t-shirts from there too. They just have a good style and I like the way I look in them.

But more reason for me to like them... their hot models!! More specifically, Brazilian model Michael Camiloto. YUM!! He's so hot! If you follow me on Twitter, then you already know how I feel about him. HAHA. But he's just AMAZING. Here are some pics from the new February 2010 mini-catalog that was mailed to me yesterday. You be the judge:

Ok... I'm SO Gay..

HAHA, I can't deny it. I'm gay... because I'm SO into figure skating right now. It has rapidly become my latest hobby and probably one of my "phases" in which I pick up something and then drop it in a matter of weeks. HOWEVER, I'm hoping it's not just a phase and that I continue with it because I'm actually having lots of fun and I'm seeing results.

Last week, after watching the Men's Figure Skating on the Olympics, my friends and I were motivated to go ice skating ourselves. We found a night and went to the nearby rink and had TONS of fun. I hadn't been on the ice in years and it was great to just skate around. Before we left, we went on YouTube to learn how to do some simple jumps and spins. We actually got a few good pointers because we were able to do some tricks. They were UGLY.. but we did them!

After that night, I was hooked. I immediately went on youTube again and researched more. I looked up the ice rink's website and found that they offer classes. I've been in contact with the rink manager and he's going to give me a quick evaluation to see where I place in the classes. And then they're going to start in April. And they're relatively cheap. Actually a very good deal. I've also went online and bought my own pair of figure skates. :P I figured if I'm going to be going a lot, I'd rather have my own pair of skates. And they weren't that expensive! They're not the best because those can cost up to $500!! But I got a pair for $60 that are going to be just fine for me. I can't wait to skate on the ice with them next week.

I went again today with my friend, who I found out last week, used to be a trained figure skater! He stopped training years ago, but when he was there with me today, he looked so good! He taught me some technique and corrected me on my skating. He gave me some good pointers to help me. I learned how to do the backwards crossover... that's the thing that the figure skaters do when they skate backwards and are making a turn. That was my goal for today.. to learn how to do that. I had NO idea how to do it before, but now I can do it! Again, it looks sort of ugly and choppy, but HEY, I can do it and I just need more practice. I'm definitely bringing my friend along every time I go!

Anyway, here's a video of me doing those backward crossovers. :) My goal is to be able to do a double jump. I will die a happy man if I can have that under my belt.
And THAT is why I'm SOO gay.

I'm a Tramp

Last night, I was called for a photo shoot at work. Along with one of my friends, we re-enacted the pasta scene from Lady and the Tramp. She was dressed more classy while I was more casual... to go along with the Lady and the Tramp idea. Our clothes' color palette matched the fur color of the dogs and they dressed the set as closely as possible to the animated movie. We had a plate of spaghetti in front of us but we used a piece of string to put in our mouths for the actual shots.

They took a whole bunch of shots! I felt like I did a horrible job. I just don't know how to take any pictures that doesn't involve me smiling with a giant smile. I can't do subtle smiling.. or serious looks.. I'm just incapable of that. So I just hope I got lucky and they got a few good shots that they can use.

The photo shoot is for a new campaign that will be going in magazines and local newspapers. They say it'll hit the stands in the next couple of weeks. So I'm definitely going to be keeping my eyes open for it! It was a long night (10pm - 5am) but it was way fun. :)

Mansions, and Theaters, and Ocean Views... OH MY!

I am still in awe... someone pick my jaw off the ground please.... oh thank y... oh wait.. sorry, it dropped again...

So today, I had a date with a guy that I met online. He seemed like a cool guy.. a little bit of a prick at first, but I forgave him because he's good looking and is from Australia. I am in LOVE with Aussies. :P So I asked if he wanted to hang out some time. That some time was this morning. I woke up early to get ready and so that I could get to his house by 11:30. He lived about 35 minutes away from me so I had to plan accordingly.

I got in my Prius and turned on the GPS. I input his address into the system and off I go. The GPS took me all the way out to the ocean. The weather was BEAUTIFUL today... I was welcoming it after a full week of brutal thunderstorms. I drove a bit along the coast, when the GPS told me to turn up into the hills. So I was driving up the hill, the houses are getting nicer and nicer. I was wondering where I was going... I got closer and I realized that I was all the way at the top where the highest houses are. And then I saw it... a 5-story modern piece of architecture. THAT'S the house?? I walked up the stairs to get to the front door. I rang the doorbell and through the intercom he said he'll be up in a bit. As I wait, I looked out to the ocean... a SPECTACULAR view. It was seriously breathtaking.

I'm nervous at this point... meeting a guy that I don't know at all other than a few conversations online. And to top it off, this guy is seemingly LOADED. He opened the door and I stepped into view of him. He's skinnier than in the pictures... but still good looking. Maybe if he washes up a bit... He welcomed me into his house and apologized for the way he looks because he slept in. He had a long night last night. He took me up a flight of stairs and says, "You better get used to stairs... you gotta like stairs." With an Australian accent, nonetheless. YUMMM!! We exchanged some formalities and he asked if I want anything to drink. I opted for water. Then he proceeded to take me to the stairs again and into a room with plush carpet and giant bean bag chairs on the ground. Before I knew what was going on, he was pressing a bunch of buttons on a fancy console and the projector turned on lighting up a a GIANT movie screen. And then I could hear electronic whirring noises. Looking around I saw that the curtains were closing automatically, blocking out the sun. He turned on "Invention of Lying," the Ricky Gervais movie, saying that he started watching it the other day and wanted to finish it.

He picked one of the bean bags and plopped himself on it. Not wanting to be too forward, I sat down on another bean bag. We spent the entire movie on our respective bean bags. No chance for cuddling. Not really a cuddling movie any way. But throughout the course of the movie we did have a few conversations. Most intriguing was that he admitted to not having many gay friends. Most of his friends are straight. Not sure if he doesn't like hanging out with gay guys or what... But I was glad he was hanging out with me. :)

When the movie ended he he took me on a tour of the MANSION. We have more conversations along the way. And hopefully he didn't see me gawking at everything I was seeing. A beautiful spa/pool area. Floor-to-ceiling glass windows overlooking the Pacific Ocean. The fur-lined elevator. LOL. Giant jacuzzi tub. I just have never been in a house like this before. It's just amazing!

I talked with him more and I asked what kind of business he's in. Well, he's an owner of a civil engineering company that builds tunnels, bridges, etc. for the government and then sells it to them as a product. He's a 55% owner of a publicly traded, multi-million/billion dollar company. I couldn't make out if he said million or billion because I was just so in shock at that point. Thank goodness that I had told him what MY job was first... Would've been embarrassing to talk about my measly job after his. Oh.. and he's only 28!

Then he took me into his room and we went on his computer because he wanted to show me some pictures of the damage to his house from the thunderstorms. There were mudslides and flooding in his neighborhood. Luckily his house didn't have too much damage but there was a LOT of mud. Just sat next to him on his bed while looking at these pictures. He also showed off me his house that he recently sold in Hollywood. Of course he bought a new one in Beverly Hills, but he's renovating it. He bought it for $5 million but it's gonna take about $18 million to renovate, so it'll end up being a $23 million home. Was he exaggerating?... I'm really not sure...

Unfortunately, after the pictures, it was already past the time that I needed to leave (I had work). So he took me down the several flights of stairs, past his pool table and giant office, through his garage, and down his driveway. We said our goodbyes, awkwardly. I went in for a hug, but he was moving around or something at the same moment so I sort of jerk back, and then start walking away. He said something about behaving or whatever, but I was too embarrassed to make out what he was saying. I turned back around one last time and said BYE, with a huge smile on my face to mask my embarrassment.

I got in my car and I just sort of sat there for a minute, taking in what had just happened. I just spent about 3+ hours with a hot, rich, Australian with a gorgeous mansion. AMAZING!! I drive and get to work and decide that it's been long enough that I can text him. Thanks for having me over, _(Aussie)_. I had a great time. Hope to hang out again soon.  


As I waited for a reply and thought back about our "date," I realized that we didn't even touch once. We didn't shake hands when we first met. He didn't hug me when he said goodbye. Not once did we touch. I started to think that he wasn't going to reply back because he just simply wasn't interested. 10 minutes later: Hey dude, hit me up when ur free next and we can line something up. So maybe he IS interested. :P Next "date": tomorrow night!

To Be Continued....

"Come and knock on our door..."

So it finally happened. =P Had my very first threesome last night. It was supposed to happen a few weeks ago, but it fell through. But last night, it came together... and it was pretty fun!! I was a bit nervous going into it... was thinking about it all day. And walking up to the door, I was still a bit nervous. But once I got there, it wasn't all that bad. One of the guys is Jason, and the other guy is someone that Jason's hooked up with before. So I got in the room and me and the other guy, Chris, shook hands awkwardly. LOL. I would've never hooked up with him normally, but Jason put this together for me, so I went with it. I mean, he's not bad looking, but he wasn't my type.

I sat on the bed and Jason got things going. He unzipped my pants and went right for a blowjob. He got me hard right away and things just went from there. Pretty soon, we were all sucking each other and making out. I was the bottom in the 3some so they took turns fucking me. And god it felt so good. I've blogged about it before, but I hadn't had sex in a while. So this was one heck of a way to get back to it. The two guys had me on the edge of cumming a few times. And I've learned that I most definitely like it better when I'm on my back or when I'm riding them on top. I don't like it on my stomach or doggy style... doesn't feel as good. =P

Afterwards, the other guy, Chris, had to leave right away cuz he was allergic to Jason's cat. I was in the bathroom washing up when he just left so I didn't even say bye. Talk about a fuck and run. HAHA. Jason and I went to Denny's for some food afterwards since I was super hungry. I didn't eat before all of this so I really needed some food in me.

So my reaction to my first 3some... well.. it was fun! But I didn't feel like it was much different than having sex with one guy. It was a bit more fun sucking on another guy's dick while getting fucked or having my dick sucked while getting fucked. But I think next time I have a threesome, I'm going to want hotter guys to do it with... ;)

My Ass Hurts

I had the most amazing time!! Snowboarding that is! ;)

It was my first time snowboarding so it took me a while to get it.. which is why my ass hurts. I fell on my ass sooo many times. LOL. And there was ONE fall right on my tailbone that really kept me down. I couldn't move for a few minutes. And now I can't really sit back on my tailbone... I have to sit up straight. Well, it's better now, because this was a few days ago now, but I'm still definitely sore in a lot of places. However, I think I'm going back again in a month of two when there's more fresh snow! I can't wait because I want to get better at it! I started to get the hang of it on my last run, so I think with a few more runs, I can finally do a run without falling. HAHA.

Wasn't Meant To Be...

I've been really lazy lately. And not just lazy like not getting up and out of bed on time.. but so lazy that I can't even be bothered prepare myself for some hot sex. I know what you're thinking.. and yes, I'm THAT lazy. I'm worried that it's also because my sex drive isn't the same as before, and that's a even worse thing than just being lazy. Whatever it is, I haven't had sex for months now.

Well, tonight, I finally got back some of that sex drive. I was at home doing my P90X when I noticed that in the apartment across from me, there was a hot shirtless guy walking around with all his windows wide open. I could tell he had a nice body. So I took off my shirt and opened up all my windows too so try and show off. I don't even know if he was looking into my window (and he most likely wasn't) but I just kind of got off from the possibility that he was watching. So after that, I was pretty horny. I started messaging Jason and tried to see if he was horny as well. (Jason's been trying to have sex with me again these past months but I've said no because I just haven't been feeling it) So I hinted at him coming over and have sex with me with the windows open so that the guy across from me can watch. He sort of laughed. And then I didn't get a response from him for a while. While he was gone, I kept telling him to come over and fuck me. And then about 25 minutes later, he finally replies and says, "Oh... I thought you were playing with me since you haven't been wanting to so I already jacked off and went to get food." ........ sigh....... I was so bummed. I was all ready. I even prepared myself for sex. If you're a bottom, then you know what I'm talking about :P But then he said no.... Blah.

I guess it just wasn't meant to be tonight. Hopefully I'll get the same level of horniness tomorrow and will want some sex. :P Keep your fingers crossed for me!