Friday, August 29, 2008


Of course it's only fitting that I introduce myself when starting a new blog. I've been wanting to start my own blog for a long time. There's a lot of things that I just need to express and a blog is really the only place that I can do it.

First, I want to thank Matt at Debriefing The Boys for giving me the inspiration to start my own blog. I've been a loyal reader of his blog for a while now and the way he's so open and honest about everything is something I want to emulate. If I can be half as eloquent as him, I will be happy. :)

I feel like I'm a dime a dozen here in the blog world, but I am a closeted 23 year old who's so desperately trying to figure out his life. For the past 6 years, I was in a relationship with a wonderful girl. We met in high school, shared many common interests, and just had great fun with each other. While I was denying my true feelings inside, I did fall in love with her and we had some great years together. But towards the end of our relationship, I really couldn't deny it much more. Basically, she found my porn and it went pretty much downhill from there. However, we've stayed incredibly close and we're still best friends. So I'm just happy that she's still there for me.

As for why I couldn't deny myself much more, I started working for a big entertainment company in Southern California that's notorious for being open to gays (isn't too hard to figure it out, but I'm never gonna actually say it). And just being around them reminds myself of who I really am. However, I was still with my girlfriend, and the friends that I made at work knew me as straight. So herein lies my predicament. I'm no longer with my girlfriend, and everyone knows that we broke up, but for past 4 years, I've lied to all my friends about being gay. So while you may think it'd be easy to just come out to all my gay friends, I just feel like I'm a big fat liar. But I'm working on it, and I hope that the Right Time and Place will come along where I can let everyone know the real me.

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