Birthday Present

So I didn't really blog much about my birthday. I guess it wasn't that exciting. However, I did have dinner with a group of my closest friends at Souplantation and I was very happy that they took time out of their schedule to celebrate my birthday with me. I had such a great time chatting with all of them and the food was awesome. I love me some Souplantation!!! or it's Sweet Tomatoes for some of you... and for those of you who have no idea what those are... it's basically a salad buffet. But they also have wonderful baked goods and some delicious soups. I go there for the clam chowder! It's AMAZING!

On a different day, I also invited some friends over to play Nintendo Wii. That was also a lot of fun! We mostly played Guitar Hero and Mario Kart. I hadn't played in a LONG time so I was pretty bad at both. I really need to play more video games. HAHA. It just sits there, collecting dust, when I paid so much money for the console and the games! How did I afford all that crap?! Maybe I need to sell my games to get some extra money.... Some of those games I don't ever play and I can at least get about $5 for each of them, I think... Sigh, anyway... Wii Party went well. Again just glad that i have friends who want to spend some time with me. :)

As for presents, I didn't really ask for anything this year. My mom and my sister gave me cash. Loved that. :) And I got a gift card to Yogurtland from one of my friends. Yogurtland is a self-serve frozen yogurt shop with tons of differen froze yogurt flavors and then you pile on fruit and candy toppings. You pay by the ounce so you can put as much or as little as you want in your little cup. SOOO freakin' good!

But a really nice surprise birthday present came from torchy! :) A few days after my birthday, I received a thin package in the mail from the UK. He had told me he was going to be sending me something so I was excited to see it. He printed out two gorgeous pictures that he had taken and sent them over to me. They're quite spectacular pictures:

I scanned them into my computer so the quality may have suffered a bit, but I assure you the pictures look AMAZING in person. THANKS torchy! You're the best!! I love them so much and can't wait to get them framed and hanging on my wall! :)

Might As Well Update

I wrote a reply to the comments from my last blog, and I thought I'd just write a post about it since it's kind of important and not everyone looks at the comments.

So I've had a few comments from concerned readers about me being fuck buddies with Jason and how, in the end, I'm going to end up being hurt if I'm not careful. I fully appreciate their comments and I want to thank you guys for caring about me and looking out for me. And because of your comments, I know I will be careful. But, I've decided to go along with the sex. Here is what I wrote back to the comments:

@ HCI, Godfrey, and Aek: thank you for being concered about me. I really appreciate it. I've taken your advice into consideration, but... I've decided to be fuck buddies with him. As Anonymous points out, I do like that he was honest about it and that he cared enough to not hurt me like his previous relationship had hurt him. Now that I know how he feels, I am confident I can draw that line myself and not get extremely attached. Obviously I'm keeping my options open with other guys.

In other news, I've already bought the "Commando" underwear from Aussiebum and they're on their way! However, I'm not going to be getting him the blank DVDs. I was over at his place last night (I'll talk about that in a sec...) and I asked him about his DVDs. Well, he started to burn a few and he took out his giant tower of DVDs that he has. So, I feel like he wouldn't like it as much. I'm sure he would appreciate it still.. but I want him to like it. So, I've decided on something else. But let me talk about last night first because it goes into what I'm going to get him.

So after our talk about not wanting to date, being fuck buddies, etc... we still decided to go on our dinner and a movie "date"... we moved it to last night instead of Saturday afternoon. And I guess I had a better time at this "date" than a real date because I felt less pressure. I could just be myself. And we both paid for ourselves (although he did pay for the tips for me since I paid with cash and he paid with card.. I was going to add more cash for tips, but he told me not to worry about it). Ok, I'm getting ahead of myself though.... anyway... So I got off of school and I picked him up at his house. We went to this place called Maggiano's, a really nice Italian restaurant with GIANT portions. We both ordered a full size plate of pasta and OMG it was HUGE! Sooo much pasta! but OH so yummy.

Anyway, during our dinner, we talked about a lot of different things. He talked about his childhood and his problems growing up. He comes from a really poor family and he had to cope with several learning handicaps too. But he was able to move out to Southern California and find himself a job and support himself. He still takes care of his mom, sending her money every month. It's very sweet of him. We talked about our favorite foods and we talked about desserts that we like. And then he says he LOVES all kind of ice cream, and he's recently discovered and started liking Green Tea ice cream... LIGHTBULB! Green Tea ice cream is a little rare, and can't be found everywhere. BUT I have an Asian supermarket that I go to that I KNOW will have it.

So for his birthday, I'm getting him a nice birthday card, the matching Aussiebum underwear, and GREEN TEA ICE CREAM! mmmm yummy! hehe. I think it's going to be a good gift and I really hope he likes it. What do you guys think?

Oh yeah, after dinner, we saw Transformers 2. I liked it. LONG, but I liked it for the most part. We both enjoyed it. Then we drove back to his house, and I stayed over for the night. Being fuck buddies,... we fucked. LOL. And oh it's so freaking good. I came a total of 3 times before I left his place. We're both just super horny all the time and horny for each other, which is a big reason why I've decided on our unique relationship. I do think having this friendship benefits the both of us: he needs more gay friends, and I need more non-work friends. He's pretty much my only non-work friend that I want to hang out with, and I'm his only gay friend that he wants to hang out with. So for now it works out nice.

And one last thing.. and congrats to those who read through this whole post and got here.. a few of you have asked about my P90X progress so I decided to take a few pictures for you ;) Here's my best frame. hehe. Comments on my progress (that will boost my ego) are greatly appreciated ;)

Well That Answers That...

Not very good news tonight. Got home at around 11:30pm and started chatting with Jason on AIM. We were talking about dinner and a movie when this conversation happened...

Jason: So I have to ask. You sure you are ok with us being just friends? I know we are closer than we should be for being friends... the sex and all.

Me: Well are you not looking for anything more than just friends at all?

Jason: I am just not into dating right now. I understand if you are not ok with that.

Me: You had told me that from the beginning so I understand.

Jason: I just had my heart broken and I want to make sure to not do that to you.

Me: Thanks. To be totally honest, I think I really like you. But I'm glad you're telling me this now. Well, tell me this... do you see ANY potential of us dating in the future?

Jason: I don't know. Not right now at least.

So there we go... at least now I know. I'm not going to lie... I really started to like him but I guess I was being overly optimistic. I DID know that he wasn't looking for a relationship when this all started, so I was just being naive in thinking that spending a few days with me would change that.

I've made the decision to stay friends with him. He continued to tell me that I'm really his only gay friend that he has right now. And I have no reason to not believe him. And the sex is really quite good so I'm ok with us having some benefits too. I know that you'll all have something to say about this, but I'm holding on to some sort of hope that he'll warm up to an idea of dating later on. I truly believe that he's not ready to date because of what happened with his last relationship and not because he doesn't like me. I mean, why else would be insist on us staying friends and ask to hang out still? (we're still going to have a "dinner and a movie" night tomorrow... I can't very well call it a "date" anymore though, I guess)

I know what you're all thinking... If I go down this path, I'm going to end up being hurt. But I really don't want to lose him as a friend. He's about my only friend outside of work, and I really can't afford to lose that. I'm just going to go along with it and hope for the best.

Oh and THANK YOU to all who gave me advice on the birthday gift. I took a lot of your advice into consideration and I had decided on a gift for him (before the "not ready to date" conversation):

• Pack of Blank DVDs (he has a huge collection of burned DVDs that he's quite proud of)
• Pair of "Commando" Aussiebum underwear (with a matching pair for myself)
• A nice birthday card with a nice birthday message

I already bought the Aussiebums online so I'm for sure giving those to him. And you can't give a gift without a birthday card, so I'm doing that as well. So I guess I just have to decide whether or not to get him the blank DVDs. I was going to buy a pack of 50 for $12.99 at Best Buy. Should I just forget it? Or should I just go for it and buy it for him? I know that buying him these gifts won't automatically change his mind about dating... but maybe it'll give me a few points that will count when he does decide he's ready to date again...

Advice on Birthday Gift

Hey guys, I need you advice. PLEASE please please comment because I need as much input as possible. And ASAP. So even if you've never read this blog before or never commented before, PLEASE do so now.

So the boy I'm seeing, Jason... his birthday is coming up next Wednesday July 15th. I really want to get him something. The thing is, I'm not sure what to get him because I'm not really sure what we are yet. He's mentioned the words "friends with benefits" which I kind of got a little sad to hear? But he's willing to hang out and stuff, I invited him to go to my friends' 4th of July party with me and he was actually contemplating it.. and I invited him to the circus that's coming in town and he said yes. So... I guess I'm still confused as to what kind of relationship we have. Regardless, I still want to get him a birthday gift.

Now, I've had one person suggest that I get something kinky/sex related. Why? Because a week ago when I stayed over at his place, he tied me up with arm restraints that he had installed on his bed! HEHEHE. Oh and I was blind folded too. OMG, so hot.

But should I get a more traditional birthday gift? Something cheap though... cuz I don't want him to think I'd spend so much money on him when we're just "friends" for now. Something funny, perhaps? He was also telling me about his skydiving and swimming with the dolphins so he's done a lot of cool things. And then he was telling me about his scars and the multiple times he's been to the hospital cuz he's a bit of a daredevil. hehe. So something related to that could be funny? I dunno.. That's why I need your help!

So please please please give me some input! I'll love you forever!! THANKS guys! If there's a group of guys that I know I can count on, it's you guys!!