Mommy Issues

So yesterday, my family came down to visit me. It was my mom, my dad, my sister, and her two kids. They stayed at my apartment for an hour or so. My dad had never seen my apartment before so he was interested to see what it looked like. My niece played the Wii Fit for a bit. It was fun times watching her do the hula hoop game. hehe. Afterward, we went to Red Lobster for dinner. I got the Ultimate Feast. SOO freakin' good! And then they drove home.

I got home, turned on the TV and relaxed, but about 15 minutes into whatever I was watching, I just got super tired and let my head rest on one of my couch pillows. I proceeded to sleep through the entire episode. This was at 9pm... I usually don't sleep until 3am. So it was weird. So I just decided to go with it and go to bed and sleep. Which I did. And I had a horrible dream.

So, in my dream, I was living at home again with my parents. My mom and dad were both in the dream. We were back in my old house where I grew up in. My mom comes in my room and tells me that it's time for me to be sent to church. She had somehow found out about me being gay and wanted to send me to my aunt's church to fix the problem. My father agreed. I locked myself in my room and refused to go. I then snuck out of the house, stole one of the cars, and drove off... crying. And that's when I woke up.

It was horrible... I was awake in my bed and just couldn't move or think about anything else. It was so weird. It's a very real possibility that my mom and dad would want to send me somewhere if she found out that I'm gay. Which is why I don't ever want to tell her... ever! But then I also have times when I think about later on in my life when I find someone I want to be with but can never tell my family about him. What is THAT gonna be like? It's just an incredibly frustrating, sad, and horrible situation. My parents are not understanding. They're Chinese. They don't accept homosexuality. Sigh... FML.