Trying to Play Dead

So yesterday, I called the Central Casting hotline to check for any extra work that I can get. There were quite a few potential jobs and I actually replied to a call for a Filipino looking man, late 20s, to play a dead soldier for the upcoming movie Terminator: Salvation. The description is a dead soldier in the rain, lying on the ground, in just his boxers. The background is that the soldier was killed and his uniform was stripped off of him so that the bad guys could wear it. Wet and naked on the ground?! How fun would that have been! Obviously, I didn't get it... but it's just so cool that I CAN be doing things like this!

Biting Off More Than I Can Chew

First off, I continue to get the MOST views from a reader in Fullerton. I'm soooo curious to know who you are! Have you already said "HI" and I just didn't know it was you? Email me at nytedragon@gmail.com if you are the Fullerton reader! Well, heck, email me even if you aren't the reader! I just love emails ;) .... now back to regularly scheduled programming...

Today, I went full steam ahead on a project that I had been preparing for a long time. It's a short documentary film about the parade that I was involved with at Disneyland. It's more of a farewell video now... being made as a way to remember the parade. I'm going to be sharing this film with my fellow cast members and crew members.

Now, I have no real experience in film making. I have not taken any sort of film classes while in school and everything I've learned to do has been self taught. I bought some books on film making, especially documentary film making, and read a few online papers on the subject as well. So I have some idea of what I need to be doing, but now that I've really committed to this, I'm a little scared that I won't be able to actually achieve an end product that I will be proud of.

Today, I went inside Disneyland to do some location scouting for possible interview locations. A few of my friends were with me to help me in this process. And since we had time, I actually conducted some interviews too. It was actually fun. But in reviewing the tape, I found that there were many problems with the footage. The lighting wasn't the best, the audio was a mess (because our cell phones were turned on and I could hear the GSM feedback.. the noise you hear when you put your phone up near a speaker), the camera was shaky (because I didn't want to bring a tripod into Disneyland because I didn't want to draw extra attention to us), and the camera operator just did a poor job keeping the camera steady.

I just want everything to look and sound good, but so far, this first try has been a failure. I just hope that further interviews will be better. I guess I have a list of things that I know I need to change for the next time I go out and film. But I just hope I don't run into further problems.

In addition, I still have to learn how to use the new Video Editing software that I got for my computer: Final Cut Express. The software that was included with my Mac (iMovie) just isn't going to cut it because I'll need more functions in editing the audio and video. But I haven't even figured out how to import the footage into the computer using Final Cut Express yet! I think that is my biggest worry right now... it seems pretty complicated. I have an instructional book on the software, but I just haven't had the patience to sit there and read it. I guess I better do that soon!

Well, wish me luck on this project... I'm going to need it.

Extra Work

This morning, Jon and I went on a little field trip up to Burbank, CA to register ourselves for Extra work. And Extra as in television and movie extras... the background actors. We got there at the slotted 10:30am - 11:30am for registration and there was already a lot of people there. We stood in the big room while the lady made her announcements and explained the forms we had to fill out. During this time, Jon and I were NOT smart enough to notice where the registration table was and how they were on the OTHER side of the room from where we were standing. So when it came time to register, a mad rush of people went to line up in front of the registration tables and Jon and I were left to queue way behind them. The line started around 10:45am... I didn't get to leave the premises until 1:15pm. BLAH.

So we stood in line forever. There were two lines. Jon was in a different line because they separated us. Don't know why we didn't just insist on standing in the same line. So, of course, cuz this is just how my life works, I'm in the SLOW line. The lady working my line was this young girl who looks like she hadn't eaten in 5 days and moving SO slowly. Jon's line, however, had a lady who has clearly had her breakfast because she was zooming through everyone's paperwork. I think 2 or 3 people completed their registration in Jon's line for every 1 person in my line. It was ridiculous.

After paperwork came time to take our picture. Boys had the option of just taking on picture with our shirts on or taking an additional picture with our shirts off at no additional cost. Um... why NOT take the shirt off? It would mean that the casting directors have one more picture to look at you and you may be considered for scenes that involve bathing suits, swimming, whatever. And it didn't cost any extra for the extra photo! So it was a no-brainer to me! But apparently, people were too shy to do it. Yes, people can see you in the photo room taking your shirt off. But whatever! I'm used to it. I'm a big ol' slut that shows off on cam, so this was no biggie. :P Jon didn't do it. He complained about how the lighting was horrible and the white background was just going to wash him out cuz he was so pale. BLAH BLAH BLAH. What a pussy. It's not like he has a bad body either. Whatever - he'll only have himself to blame when I book more shows than him.

So yay! I'm now registered to become an extra in TV and movies!! A bunch of my friends went to register last week and just yesterday, two of them got work on the set of BROTHERS AND SISTERS (!!!!!!), dressed in bikinis for a pool scene. LOL! Ok, first off, Brothers and Sisters is one of my favorite shows on television! It's on ABC on Sunday nights at 10pm (after Desperate Housewives). Second... um... there is no second. It's just TOTALLY AWESOME that they were getting paid to be near celebrities the whole day!

So I'm excited to hopefully get a gig soon. Apparently, there have been a lot of calls for HOUSE! And CSI:NY! And some people are saying that they're starting to cast extras for the next Twilight movie too. This is some exciting stuff! And you better believe that if I book a job, I'll let you all know about it so you can look for me on TV or the big screen! ;)

Bromance, Viriginity

Has anyone watched Bromance on MTV? I didn't realize it was a competition series where Brodie Jenner "auditions" guys to be a part of his posse. Sigh... how ridiculous. Ok, I gotta admit: Brodie Jenner is pretty hot. He has a nice-ish body and really good looks. But how the hell did he get his own tv show?? And the episode I just watched had him randomly taking a shower and his two current friends barge in asking him for something. Obvious ploy just to get a shot of him taking a shower and showing off his body/tattoos (cuz they used the shower shot several times later in the episode). I just thought it was the most ridiculous thing I've ever watched, yet I couldn't bring myself to change the channel. Kinda like a multi-car collision being broadcast on the news, I guess.

While watching TV, I was chatting with Matty online. He told me he was watching Juno. (GREAT movie, by the way!) He randomly quotes the movie: "At least I still have your virginity." I forget which part of the movie that is.. but then after a few minutes, he proceeds to ask me, "So who has your virginity?" Is it just me, or is that not a very personal question to ask? I kinda just laughed it off and told him it would be a story for another time. But I was thinking to myself, "Did he really just ask me that?" I'm not really making that big of a deal out of it, but I just thought I'd share and get your opinions on the matter. I guess I loss my virginity twice... first time having vaginal intercourse (yes.. ewww... get it out... lol) and then being on the receiving end of anal intercourse. And lots of drama in both cases - I just didn't want to open that door, I guess.

Well that was short lived...

Got an email at 4:30pm today...

I regret to inform you that due to changes in our staffing at the high school, we will not be hiring a part-time math teacher at this time. We highly encourage you to check Edjoin on a continuous basis in the event openings occur in the future. Thank you for your interest in XYZ Unified School District. We wish you the best of luck in securing a teaching position during these difficult economic times.

So much for teaching. HA. I guess it's better this way. I really don't know how I would've driven all the way up to XYZ 5 days a week. Major traffic on the freeways that I'd take. It would have probably taken me close to 1.5 - 2 hours to get there because of the traffic. WAY too much time in a car. I did that during my last year at UCLA and I promised myself I would never make such a long commute again!

So... I guess teaching is off the table again, for now. I had my Bank of America phone interview this morning too. It went well enough... but I think it was obvious that I had just woken up. You know how your voice is deeper and less energetic right when you wake up no matter how hard you try? Yea... I had that. And because I had just woken up, I don't really remember how well I spoke, how clear I was with my answers, or how believable my lies were... :P But I guess I'll keep everyone updated on that.

Teaching...

Hey, remember when I wrote that one blog about not wanting to teach yet?

HA... well, about 15 minutes ago, I submitted an application for a part time position teaching 9-12th grade Algebra at my former high school. I randomly went on the website (EdJoin.org) that teachers go through to search for teaching positions and randomly looked at my former high school's section. And when I saw that they had a part time position, I got really excited about it. That's exactly what I wanted. Something that doesn't take up all my time, since it would only be 3 periods a day, and a perfect way to ease into teaching. And it would only be the 2nd semester, which starts February 2nd and ends June 11th. And it's the subject I want to teach and the age group I want to teach.

Sigh... the only problem is I wasn't ready for this at all. The deadline for submitting this application was TODAY. This morning, to be exact. And I didn't have everything ready to be submitted. See, we have to scan our official documents/certificates and submit them as attachments. Well, I never scanned my official transcripts from UCLA or UCI. So I only have unofficial school records to send them. I'm pretty sure that's a deal breaker with them. I did email the contact person to explain the situation, and hope they'll understand and still consider me for an interview. Who knows...

Funny thing is, the contact person is one of my childhood friend's mom. hehe. I've known her since 1st grade, when I first moved to the US and started school here. We went through elementary school, middle school, and high school together. So I Facebook-ed her, and told her that I just emailed her mom. LOL. I didn't blatantly imply that she should talk to her mom on my behalf... but I hope she got the hint!!

Well anyway, wish me luck with an interview for the position... I actually do kind of want this!

Golden Globes and 24!

The Golden Globes are tonight!
And it's the season premiere of 24! Jack Bauer! It's been 2 years!
Just wanted to share my enthusiasm. LOL.

Doctor Who

Thanks to my good friend, Barry, I've been watching episodes of Doctor Who on iTunes. Just like me before I was introduced to it, I'm sure those of you who live in the US have NO idea what Doctor Who is. And for my European and especially UK readers, you're probably really excited that I'm writing about this! ;)

Well, Doctor Who is a SciFi TV show that's been pretty long running. They've recently (in the past 4 years) revived the show. It's about an alien man, the Doctor, who time travels around the universe, helping aliens along the way when help is needed. I guess, that's a good summary of it? I dunno. I'm sure someone else can explain it a lot better than I can... let me find something online:

(From Wikipedia)
Doctor Who is a British science fiction television programme produced by the BBC. The programme depicts the adventures of a mysterious alien time-traveller known as "the Doctor" who travels in his space and time-ship, the TARDIS, which normally appears from the exterior to be a blue 1950s police box. With his companions, he explores time and space, solving problems, facing monsters and righting wrongs.

So there ya go. It's quite interesting. It has the same sort of production value as Buffy the Vampire Slayer - lots of things remind me of it: the humor, the creepiness, the mysteriousness, the suspense. If anyone wants a new show to watch, I highly recommend downloading a few episodes!

Boycott

My good friend from high school, Sean, sent me a list of supporters for the Yes on Prop 8 campaign that banned gay marriage from the California Constitution. He wanted me to share this with everyone here so that we can boycott these companies. I do not want to give these companies my business if they're going to support taking away my rights.

• C&L Restaurant Group - Largest franchisee of Burger King locations in So Cal; Richard Cross, restaurant operator, donated $4,000 to the campaign. Donation verified on LA Times.
• T-Bird Restaurant Group - Exclusive rights to franchise Outback Steakhouse in California. CFO Mikkel Christensen donated $2,000. Donation verified on LA Times.
• WKS Restaurant Corporation, company with franchise rights for El Pollo Loco. Roland Spongberg, President, donated $6,000 to Yes on 8. Donation verified on LA Times.
  
• Yard House - Restaurant Partner ("Owner"), Executive Chef Carlito Jocson donated $100. Donation verified on LA Times.
  
• Real Mex Restaurants - Steven Tanner, CFO, donated $500.00 Restaurants under their belt include all: El Torito, Chevy's and Acapulco, as well as smaller concepts Las Brisas, Casa Gallardo, Who Song & Larry's, and El Paso Cantina. Donation verified on LA Times.
  
• A-1 Self Storage, with 30 locations across California. Owner Terry Caster and family members donated $693,000.
  
• Apple Gilroy Inc., corporate name of Applebee's Restaurants.
  
• Alan Stock, the head of the large movie chain Cinemark, which also goes by the names by Century Theatre, CineArts and Tinseltown, gave $9,999 to the 'Yes on 8' campaign.
  
• A slew of other small family owned restaurants are also listed as well as Michael O'Grady, operating partner for three San Diego County locations of PF Chang's.

I'm bummed to see that El Pollo Loco was among those on this list. I recently got a $10 Gift Certificate from them because the last time I went through the drive thru (@ 10:45 pm, when the place closes at 11:00pm), they told me that they were out of chicken! WTF? How can EL POLLO LOCO be out of chicken? So I wrote them a complaint letter through email, and in a few weeks, they sent me a $10 Gift Certificate. So, I guess they're not taking my money... so I can still use the $10 Gift Certificate and I'll still feel ok for eating it. BUT, I'm going to stop spending my own money there!

EDIT: So I woke up this morning to find that there were a few "hate comments" for this post... not what I expected to wake up to. Funny thing is, I checked Google Analytics, and it shows that NOONE searched my blog today through any keywords. They were all referred by other sites, all of them being a part of our little gay blog community. So what the heck are these haters doing hanging around gay sites?? sigh...

See... I'm NOT a Slut!

I was just on that online dating hookup site that I always go on and I was offered some "dirty sex" by this incredibly hot guy! He's blonde, and tall, and has nice muscles, and super cute. Totally my type. Well, I ask him "how dirty?" So he replies, "rough. bare. sweaty." I write back: "I like the rough and sweaty part. But I only play it safe. Sorry."

I turned down super hot guy! And I don't really feel too bad about it because I know I made the right decision! I am NOT going to have sex if it's not safe. you all should be so proud of me. :D

(and btw, if you haven't yet, please go look at the Poll on the right and read the post right below about moving my blog to WordPress...)

WordPress?

So Jon randomly asked me where to go to create his own blog, and of course I said, BLOGGER.COM!

But now, I'm thinking he should go to WordPress. JoietotheMax is a WordPress user and he highly recommends it. I actually went over to WordPress to sign up for a free account right now, thinking that I'll possibly start a second blog for my friends IRL... but then I started thinking about what I would write about... and there's pretty much nothing that I would want to write about in that blog, because everything that matters to me would be written in this one.

So then I started thinking... what if I exported my posts from this Blogger account over to WordPress? I know there's the capability to do that...

EDIT: The reason why I want to make the move to WordPress is because it has a lot more functionality. The blogs themselves look better and the WordPress dashboard does all the tracking that Google Analytics does. And uploading and posting pictures to the blog is much easier as well.

But my only fear is.... Would you guys still read my blog? I know there are some of you that have your links and subscriptions to this blog and some of you follow this blog through Blogger... So would it be too big of a hassle for you to change your subscriptions over to WordPress? I put this as my new Poll on the right, so go vote. And then write a comment on here to let me know how you feel about it.

I just wanted to get some opinions from you guys before I did anything drastic! I don't want to lose my readers cuz you guys give awesome advice and I really consider you my friends!

Speaking of readers, I track my readers through Google Analytics, and I have a reader from Uganda! And Germany! and Spain! and Austria! and Singapore! and South Africa! and Italy! and Norway! I would love it if these readers would "speak up" and write me a comment or two! I really would love to get to know my readers!

Response to Comments

I just wanted to write a post to say thanks for the well wishes from everyone on my last post.

But I just wanted to reply to a specific comment from exalen. I actually already posted a reply comment, but I wanted to write it as a post because I think everyone should read it to know a bit more about my situation.

Here's exalen's comment:

Dude, hate to have to be the voice of reason here, but I gotta ask you for a reality check.

The world is falling apart economically atm, and I think you need to play all the cards you got. If you're prepared to work at Starbucks and BOA then what is stopping you from actually using that teaching/econ degree you worked so hard for?

Since you're working towards your masters I assume you don't hate that industry. Maybe you don't love it as much as Disney, but I don't think you can afford to put all your eggs in one basket here.

Dieney may have been fun and I know you had some good times. But times change and life is not a static thing. You have to roll with the punches and adapt to survive.

Of course I wish you best of luck, and I'd love to be able to tel you to follow your dreams and damn the rest, but I also have to be the devil's advocate and ask you to look at the bigger picture and consider your long term future.

If you value your independance and want to maintain living by yourself then you have to look at all your options. Not just the easy/fun ones.

Well, here's my reply to exalen:

Thanks for playing devil's advocate. I need to hear it every once in a while.

I'm prepared to work for Stabucks and BOA because I know that working hours would work with Disney. My job at Disney doesn't require me to be there until after 2pm. Therefore a part time job at the other places in the morning is ideal.

I'm getting a Masters due to pressure from my family. Unfortunately, I don't have much of a passion for teaching. I used to. And then I went through the teaching credential program and lost it. Just wasn't what I thought. And then the opportunity to get a Masters was available so I took it because it was a relatively simple and quick way to get a Masters degree. And it made my family happy.

But you're so right about wanting to be independent and living alone... which is why I will be looking for a teaching job this Spring to start in Fall of 09. By that time, I will have received my Masters degree, which puts me at a higher pay scale. So I feel like it would be a little bit more worth it to start teaching at that time. Plus, I do plan to stay part time with Disney even after finding a teaching job.

But thanks again, exalen, for being a voice of reason. I really appreciate it

Unemployment

So I don't know whether to be more worried about being unemployed or not.

You see... I got paid two days ago. It was my paycheck for my last full week of work. Nice one too since I worked a lot of hours the last week. Then next Thursday, I'll get another paycheck that includes my last day of work and then a few sick pay hours that I cashed out. Not going to be the best paycheck, but it will still be income. After that, I'm getting another paycheck from my second job (choreographer for my former high school's show choir), so that's some more money to help me pay my bills. But then after that, I have no more paychecks...

I'm still looking for jobs. Wells Fargo hasn't replied even after two phone calls and an email. So I'm guessing that's a "no." But I did get a phone interview with Bank of America for a teller position scheduled for Monday. So wish me luck with that. This weekend, I'm going down to several Starbucks around the area to see if they're hiring, but working there would mean horribly early hours... And then I'll seek for jobs at the nearby shopping malls... Blah.

You may be asking: "Doug, you have a teaching credential. You're getting your Masters. You graduated from UCLA with an Economics degree. Why aren't you looking for better jobs?"

Well, good question... and it's a question that my family keeps asking me. But I tell them, and I tell you now, it's because I love my job at Disneyland. You seriously have no idea how much fun and how much joy it brings me. I know getting "laid off" should've been my sign to move on and get a "real" job. But I'm just not ready to go. There's still a new parade that Disneyland is developing and the auditions for it are coming at the end of this month. I'm hoping for the best with that.

And if I don't get this new parade, then only THEN will I take it as a true sign that I need to get another job.

So please just wish me luck with getting a part time job for now just to get me through the next month or two. And then wish me luck on that audition.

"This is going to sound horrible..."

So I had the talk with Matty. To paraphrase, I told him that I'm just not ready to spend so much time together so soon and that we're just moving too fast. I told him it was my fault for not speaking up about it earlier, but I just wasn't ready for a relationship yet. He asked if he should just stop coming around. I told him that I enjoyed our time together and that we should still come over to play video games and hang out from time to time.

After the talk, we were both online but we didn't IM each other for the longest time. And then out of nowhere he IMs me and asks me what I was doing. So I tell him I'm watching TV and Facebook-ing. He tells me he's watching a movie. We have some chit chat for a bit. Then he says, "ok, this is going to sound horrible... but can we still have sex?"

LOL. I really did "LOL" him back on IM. Followed be a "hahahaha." And then a "sure." :P

HAHA, so I take it that he took "the talk" real well. ;) And now I guess I have my first friend with benefits! Never had one of those before!

Video Games

So Matty just left. But we had a nice 2.5 days.

After our dinner on the first night, we played some Nintendo Wii. We had actually started playing the Wii last night after dinner. We started with Mario Kart. It was fun, but it was starting to get a little tense with the competition... so I suggested a different game. And when he saw "Marvel Ultimate Alliance", his eyes lit up. lol. So we played that for the rest of the night. I think we must have played 5 hours before we went to bed.

The next morning, we woke up next to each other, with him playing with my hard-on. It was fun, to say the least, to get jacked off when waking up. ;) Then, we had a real low key day. We met up with two of his friends for lunch at one of my favorite sushi restaurants. I was hesitant to meet his friends, but that's cuz I'm really anti-social. But, it turned out real well. We just chatted and it wasn't awkward. They were really nice people and it was cool to hang out with them.

Afterwards, Matty and I came back to my apartment and we continued to play Marvel. We did that for the rest of the night. lol. We made cookies when we got hungry, but we didn't actually eat a real dinner. We played until 1am. And we beat the game! WOOO! LOL. It was real fun. At the very end, we decided to put in a few cheat codes just to make it a little more fun. HEHE.

We then took a shower together, and we had a little fun in there. I really do love showers. ;)

This morning, we went to ramen together. He tried a new ramen and didn't like it as much as last time. But he paid for me this time. Very sweet of him. Only thing that bothered me about today was that he kept asking me to speak Cantonese. I forgot how we got on that topic, but I told him I was born in Hong Kong. And he wanted me to speak it. But it's one of my BIGGEST pet peeves to have someone ask me to speak Cantonese. I don't know why... it just bothers me a lot. And the more someone asks me, the more I won't want to do it. And he just kept asking me and I didn't like that. I asked him to stop asking me and finally he did. But do you guys have a weird pet peeve like that? If you don't, then I guess you wouldn't understand.. but it REALLY REALLY bothers me.

So you all must be wondering... what's the verdict on Matty. Well... I think that he's looking for more than what I'm looking for. I think that we've actually moved a little too quickly for my tastes. Both times he has stayed over more than a day. It's just a lot of time to spend with someone you're just trying to get to know right now. And though he's a sweet boy and I could tell he tried to be less pessimistic about stuff (for example: he caught himself when he wanted to say "I hate my life."), but it was the fact that he had to catch himself because he WAS going to say it... it just turns me off.

And also being with his friends, I can tell that he has a lot of drama surrounding him and his friends and I try to stay away from drama as much as possible. I'm sure he's not causing the drama, but if drama follows him, then I'm not sure I want to be around that.

So I guess I'm saying that Matty would be a really good friend to have, I don't think much more will come from it. I just have to find a way to let him know how I feel about it. Any suggestions on how to have "the talk" with him?

Dinner

Matty's in the kitchen cooking right now. I helped peeled the potatoes! But I'm staying out of his way cuz he wanted to cook for me. ;) He's making Garlic Mushrooms, Scalloped Potatoes, and Halva, a greek dessert.

Well I'm gonna pop my head into the kitchen to see if I can help anymore :)

A Day Away

So only about a little more than a day before I see Matty again. I'm actually really excited to see him. We're going to be having a pretty low key time together, mostly because I don't have much money due to my financial situation. When he comes down, he's actually making dinner for me. He has a whole menu set. We're getting the stuff we need at the store when he gets here, and then he's cooking. :) I've never had someone cook for me before. It's pretty cool. hehe.

He will be spending the night since he lives so far away. The next day, we're going to have ramen again. YUM. He liked it so much last time that he wants to go again. And this time he's paying. ;) No objections to that!

So I want to thank everyone for your comments and input on my situation from my last post. He didn't seem to be phased by my text. And I'm hoping that he tries to be a little more positive when he sees me. I think I'm just being honest with him and sharing my thoughts and by him accepting that, it's actually showing maturity, which is a step in the right direction. :)

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In other news, in preparation for the 5th season premiere of Lost on January 21st, I'm re-watching all of Season 4 right now. My sister bought some bootleg DVDs (people recorded the show off the TV and placed them all on DVDs to sell them) and I stole them from her tonight. So I'm going to watch them straight through. I'm on Episode 3 now. There are 13 episodes. It'll take me a little more than a day. :)

More other news, tomorrow (today... Sunday) is the last day of employment for me... I'm still trying to find a job. I'm going ot be actively looking for jobs this coming work week. I don't know where to even start, but I'll just go around filling out applications or something. I guess anything will do... but I really refuse to work fast food. I just... can't do it. Starbucks is fine.. but something like McDonald's? ... no way. Well.. wish me luck on that!

My Thoughts on Matty

In a little bit over 2 days, Matty will be coming down to visit me. I'm happy to be able to spend some time with him soon. It'll give us time to get to know each other more. We promised each other that we'd talk and find out more about each other.

I just want him to come down already, because I still have some apprehensions about starting any type of serious relationship with him.. all based on my first date with him and the texts that we've sent each other. Maybe when we get to know each other better, these apprehensions will go away.

But there are several things that cause my apprehensions. You've already read about the bowling incident... Well, for New Year's, Matty went to a party that his friend invited him to. When I called him to say hi before the New Year, he told me all about how his friend ignored him and the rest of his friends after they got there. And also that he hates life because his friends all suck. And that he wanted to go in the hot tub but her friend told her she didn't want anyone in it because she'd have to clean it the next day, but he was going to do it anyway.

I was actually at MY New Year's party when I made the phone call. And just hearing his situation brought my mood down a bit. I was frustrated for him and wondered why his friend would be so inconsiderate. But I was also frustrated at Matty that almost everything that he's ever talked about has been a downer... He's always talking about how shitty his friends are and how poorly he is treated by the people he knows. He talks about how much he hates life and how badly his life sucks.

I know some of that stuff is out of his control, but I also feel like he likes to sulk and be pessimistic about things. That's just not the the type of person I want to have a relationship with. I know I'm not the most optimistic person you'll meet, but that's more reason why I need someone more positive in my life.

So tonight, after another text from him about hating life, I text this to him:
I hope you don't hate me for saying this but I don't like it when you tell me you hate your life. I like people who can be more positive.

Was that too harsh? He replies with some sort of explanation that I don't really understand... something about saying how things suck right now makes it easier for him to take another new step. But that he really is a positive person.

Well, I guess I'm just glad I got that off my chest. His pessimism was really starting to get to me. And hopefully by me calling him out on it, he won't be so .... whiny anymore. It's just a big turn off for me.

Does it sound like I'm trying to change him? Cuz that's not my intention. But I just wanted him to know what I like and what I dislike... Could I have handled it differently? Said something different? In any case, do you guys agree that it's sort of a turn off?

New Years Party

So my last post made it sound like I was the one all drunk at the party - but it was quite the opposite. Actually, I was one of the only ones sober the whole night. I did have some champagne but I just drank my Martinelli's Sparkling Cider the rest of the night.

But my friends on the other... wow... some of them were drunk messes. Jeez. I got to ML's house at 11:30 or so. And right when I walk in, I already hear loud screaming and see people running around like crazies. LOL. Our friend Amy kept jumping up and down with her boobs half hanging out yelling my name. "Doug ____! Doug _____!!!" HAHA.

And then one point in the night, Amy took our other friend Neil's phone and so Neil started chasing her around the house. Well, they got to a corner and Neil ran smack into Kelly's face. Kelly got a bruise on the bridge of her nose and was in the bathroom examining it while Neil is still drunk and on the floor, yelling for his phone. Ridiculous! but super funny! LOL.

Other memorable moments:

• Sang the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air song because it was on TV, but all wrong cuz most everyone was drunk
• Saw the Hoveround commercial on TV and decided to crank call it and pretend to order one
• Erected a human pyramid (see figure 1)
• Jeff saw a bottle of White Zinfandel and decided that it was trashy to bring it to a party and poured it down the sink!! (what a bitch!!)
• Compared penis sizes (through a tape measure. lol. didn't really whip it out!)
• Miles gave a masterclass/seminar on how to give a great blowjob. I learned a few new things! hehe.

(Figure 1)

So I definitely had a good time! And it was one of my first New Year's parties with my friends. Actually, it might actually be my first. Every other time, I was home alone or with family. So yay!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

May everyone's 2009 be amazing and full of wonderful moments!

Love you all and will update with all the drunkeness and drama from my New Year's party soon!